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1. The school board who raised the taxes to ungodly levels just before I built my house in the district.

2. The janitor who cleans the toilets.

3. The pudgy waterboys who should be doing quicks along with the team.

4. The cafeteria chef extraordinaire who prepares the filet mignon and other delicacies.

5. Sandra Beth Geisel who most male students wish was a teacher here.

6. Groundskeeper Willie.

7. The nerd that works in the AV room that can’t get a date to the prom.

8. The hottie who cruelly pretends to be interested in said nerd.

9. The ambulance driver.

10. The fat kid who clogs the toilet.